Category Archives: Humor

THE GREAT BATTLE OF BREWER’S CORNFIELD

more-stalksThe coming of Autumn usually reminds me of one of the great military conflicts in history– the Great Battle of Brewer’s Cornfield.  No, neither Washington or Lee ever performed the amazing feat that two eleven-year-old boys did that fateful day in 1967.  Just behind the Sims house in Ashland stood a half-acre of corn owned by Thurmon Brewer– yes, the same Mr. Brewer that my blog readers met in a previous post (see “Speaking in Cursive,” May 2,2016).

The time was mid-November and the corn stalks were already brown and dry, waving in the fall wind like zombies arranged in neat death rows.  It didn’t take long for eleven-year-old imaginations to see the field as an entire legion of cruel Roman soldiers, marching shoulder to shoulder with plans to crush the women and children crouched within the walls of Fort Sims.  The only thing standing between the Legion of Death and victory was an alliance of two brave boys– Mark Sims and Walt Hill— protectors of all things good and decent.

Continue reading THE GREAT BATTLE OF BREWER’S CORNFIELD

“LOVE” RULES

peace-and-loveThe year was 1972.  Nixon was president, the Vietnam war was raging, and the evening television news was all about student unrest.  It seemed like rebelling against all manner of authority was in the air.  Some did it through music and strange wardrobe choices.  Others rebelled through drug use and the rejection of moral norms.  My parents were quite strict, so I had lots of limits on expressing personal rebellion.  Dad was a World War 2 vet.  Rebellion against authority wasn’t something that went down smoothly in the Sims home.  But, alas,  I found a way to do it.   I did it, primarily, by running my mouth.

Continue reading “LOVE” RULES

THE AMAZING AUNT BAPPY

sillouetteBessie J. Wiggins and her twin brother, Jesse B. Wiggins, were born in 1899 in rural South Carolina.  Bess and Jess, they called them, but Jess preferred to call his sister, “Bappy”– and it stuck.  Before long everyone just called her “Bappy.”  She hovers near the top of my list of “most unforgettable characters.”  My wife, Peggy, had told me about Aunt Bappy even before we married.  “I’ve never met anyone like her!” she remarked.  “And no one has ever heard her say anything bad about anyone.  She is the most kind, positive , and truly uplifting person I’ve ever met.”

We planned a trip to South Carolina for our first Thanksgiving together to attend a huge family reunion.  Peggy was so excited for me to meet the family– especially the amazing Aunt Bappy.  I looked forward to it, but prepared myself to not get my hopes up too high.  Nobody is that nice.  Her reputation, I assumed, was as much legend as fact.

Continue reading THE AMAZING AUNT BAPPY

THE HOUNDS OF HEAVEN

the-hound-of-heaven-dj-front-gh105The Hound of Heaven was a famous poem written by English poet Francis Thompson.  The name of the poem is strange, but the truth behind it is unmistakable.  “As the hound follows the hare, never ceasing in its running, ever drawing nearer in the chase, with a steady and sure pace, so does God follow a fleeing soul by His Divine grace.”  I’ve often heard people say that while in a backslidden or unbelieving state, the “Hound of Heaven”– the Holy Spirit– pursued and chased them until they finally surrendered to the chase.  It’s a beautiful picture of God’s love and grace.

But in today’s post, I want to go to a different place with the “hound” imagery.  In this case, I will go with a more literal interpretation of the hound of heaven, with a twist of the miraculous.  You’ll like it, so keep reading.

Continue reading THE HOUNDS OF HEAVEN

BIRTHDAYS AND BIG DAYS AT MAMA SIMS’ HOUSE

picture 3
Mama Sims

I always rolled my eyes when I heard my parents and grandparents talk about the “good ole days.”  They talked fondly about having to use outhouses in the freezing cold, and walking three miles to school every morning.  What’s up with that?  It’s like the grass was always greener during the Great Depression.  Whew!  That was way before air conditioning.  No, thank you.  But now that I am a parent and grandparent, I find myself doing the same thing, especially when I get together with my siblings and cousins.  How we idolize those magical days of our past!  Maybe the reason the good ole days are so nostalgic to us is because we are only able to touch them again in our memories.

I say I miss those days,  but when I think about it, they weren’t all so wonderful– at least not when I lived them the first time.  Good ole days are always better re-lived that first lived.  When nostalgia hits me, my mind especially takes me back to those birthdays and big days we spent at Mama Sims’ house.  There were two birthdays that were more important to us than those belonging to Washington or Lincoln– Mama Sims’ birthday, and Little Grandmaw’s birthday.

Continue reading BIRTHDAYS AND BIG DAYS AT MAMA SIMS’ HOUSE